mmm, skyscraper. i love you.

I had one of the most beautiful experiences of my life on Saturday evening. Chemicals, beats, some of my favourite people, old and new.

At one point, out of nowhere, I had a Bloc Party lyric stuck in my head: "We're all scared of the future." Everything seemed overwhelming, and I kept wondering: what if this is it? What if it all goes downhill from here? What if my life falls to pieces, what if my future isn't as bright and beautiful as I want it to be? At one point, I almost started crying because I was afraid to verbalise this, because I thought it would make it real.

Then somebody put on a new song, there was a gentle hug from a boy I've grown so close to. And I came to realise that no, the future is entirely in my control. I am going to take charge, I am going to meet a whole slew of wonderful people along the way, keep the wonderful creatures I call my friends right now, and I'm going to do amazing things. I just have this funny feeling, building up inside me.

And we all danced 'til sunrise, we laughed, shouted, span, and I screamed the lyrics to 'Moaner' by Underworld so loudly I thought I was Karl Hyde. We shook our arses and moved our bodies, laid on the floor, mind filled with beats and basslines and let myself fall away from reality into some perfect dream.

Thank you: this, this and this. Thank you, Luke and your generous spirit, thank you James and your big heart, thank you to everyone else for sharing the dream.

I'm useless, but not for long - my future is comin' on.